Yes, this one is all about me for a change. Well, maybe not all of it. LOL. I'm really glad that this week I actually seem to be getting back to normal. Meaning, it seems my brain is functioning again. Last week was absolutely horrible. I had a lovely panic attack last Tuesday morning and didn't even make it to work. I just felt so bad about myself, as a mother, wife, worker...just in general. It didn't help that there was a change at work for me. So I basically only made it through the week on meds. I hate doing that, I actually despise it, but I really didn't want to be sitting at work and hyperventilating. I went to see my doctor on Friday morning (yes, a psych doctor) and I didn't get new meds, but just a new perspective I guess.
So last weekend was actually pretty nice, we had really nothing going on and I got to catch up on laundry and housework, hang out with the girls in front of the TV to watch a bunch of episodes of the witches ("Charmed") which they love. And I have to admit I like it too. I got to crochet a bit, and actually said NO to people coming over on Saturday. Woohoo.
This week seems much better, I have a much better outlook so far (keep your fingers crossed), I'm actually wearing heels, a skirt and make up today. Also the change at work seems to be turning out for the better, I get to leave at 5 right on the dot, and I'm home by 5:30. Love it. I really need to remind myself to not want to take on the world. I can't do everything, even if I try. I should not feel guilty about wanting an hour to myself to read in peace in quiet or watch a TV show without being interrupted 10 million times.
And I don't feel bad that I actually gave the kids cans of Ravioli for dinner instead of a healthy homecooked meal. (OK, that doesn't really happen too much)
My wish for christmas is to get a good attitude towards my surroundings and my family and to be able to get a couple of hours of "ME" time.
